the gift of a birthday

beautiful table setting for our fall birthday party!

When I married Chris almost ten years ago of course I felt like the luckiest girl in the world. I mean every young bride does. He had picked me to spend his life with him and that in and of itself has always been more than overwhelming.

But honestly no young bride has any clue of what is laid before her as she steps down off of the alter as a new wife. I have become a mother four times, we have lived in four different homes, we have celebrated over a decade of holidays and birthdays and date nights and such.

Last night we went to my in-laws house for our annual fall birthday feast. All four of the daughters in law as well as my sweet husband have a birthday within just a few weeks and so each fall Paula spoils us with a huge, beautiful dinner and cake to kick off the season. There was a moment during the evening when we were all sitting together at the table cracking up and sending random group text messages under the table and teasing each other about who knows what. All of us lined up with our gifts and hopes, joys and wounds and hearts and kids snuggled on laps and screams from boys being tickled by uncles and cousins.

 I literally thought I was going to explode.

I was not born into a family that did this sort of thing. We were badly broken by the time I was six and by the time I married Chris I think any shred of hope for this kind of gathering had been so lost that even when I have attended family events over the years I was never been able to recognize it.

But last night was different, an awakening of sorts my heart was quiet enough to simple enjoy and take in the gift and blessing of my sweet family for once without wondering if I measure up or belong. It was the most beautiful birthday celebration I have ever attended and I have tears on my face as I write this.

I am a deeply blessed woman. As I begin my thirty third year I am feeling much more reflective and quiet. I feel life speeding up and the risk of missing it crouching at my door. I long to be an authentic woman who shares her heart freely and simply and above all I want to trust God. I am so weary of simply trying to please Him - I want to live into the freedom that is trusting Him.

This space has been quieter as of late as I mull over the seasons ahead and the hope that I have for A Bit of Sunshine as a place of encouragement, community, inspiration and truth. But I am here and I am excited about the future. I feel strength growing inside of me that I have never recognized before. Thank you for being here with me, for sharing life with me in this space.

my heart is in this photo!

Now to officially welcome this season with open arms, this new year of life that I have been so generously given. My family and friends you are all the best birthday gift I could have ever imagined and I am excited about what number 33 will hold!

xo,
Rebekah

22 comments:

  1. Happy Birthday !!!! I love family gatherings. We had one at my house yesterday. Glad you get to have this in your life.

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  2. I just love this picture at the end. So many blessings and adventures in the last few years...and you're just getting started...so much more life to live and enjoy. We are still just kids, my friend. ;)

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  3. Happy Birthday! I love that above picture it looks like pure perfection!

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  4. Deep joyful love for you, sweet sister and dear friend. I was taking in those moments at the table last night too--overflowing in my heart with gratitude to God. I love you and each one in our family so very much, and I love that we have been and continue to be on a journey together! One that I trust will reveal the beauty and grace and incredible redemption of Jesus. What a gift to be family. xoxo

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  5. I have goosebumps reading this! What a truly beautiful gathering (and photo!) Happy Birthday to you all xx

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  6. And this....is why I love you and your blog so much! :) It makes me teary...happiest of birthdays to you!!!

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  7. This was so beautiful. We just moved across the country from both of our families and this post made me see a bit more of the beauty that family can be and give me hope for future gatherings.

    Happy Birthday. I love this space and look forward to all that happens here! =)

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  8. Mmm...what a lovely description of a full heart! It made MY heart feel full.

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  9. happy birthday!
    what a blessing to be surrounded by such love!
    xoxo

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  10. Happy Birthday!! Such blessings to be surrounded with! Wishing you a most lovely and blessed year! xo Heather

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  11. Happy Birthday to you!! And what a special family you have! You are so blessed!

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  12. I was feeling some of the same things last night. I was totally humbled by the generous, thoughtful, personal gifts and, of course, Paula's loving party preparation. I look forward to many more years of events like this, as we grow more comfortable in our own skin and closer together as family.

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  13. I love this post. Happy happy birthday Rebekah! I hope the joy and peace you felt at dinner continues through the year. :)

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  14. Love that photo at the end too! The entire Gough family is so inspiring--I love how you all love each other so much! Happy birthday Rebekah! Thank you for this honest, hopeful post. :)

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  15. Happy Birthday!!!
    Indeed, family is a blessing that very often we forget to cherish.

    God bless you and your family!

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  16. What a lovely post. I LOVE your blog! I'm a new follower and was hoping that you might return the favor! Just go to: www.enjoyingtheepiphany.com, read it, and follow me if you like it! That'd be AMAZING!!

    Positively,
    Sarah

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  17. what a blessing to have amazing in-laws. happy birthday!!

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  18. This was such a lovely post... I am so glad for you to experience and realize the JOY of a wonderful family! What a blessing indeed!

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  19. happy belated birthday! i share the same sort of experience. despite the challenges of an in-law family, i'm so grateful to be blessed with tons of brothers and sisters and nieces and nephews and especially parents in law that i love and love me so well. god is good.

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