a neon friday

I've been in a neon mood this week. It started with the nails, hot pink on my hands and feet. I think I have been looking really hard for something super bright - if I am honest with you I am a bit weary.

I don't really like to talk about the downer stuff in this space I like to keep it bright and sunshiny but a few friends recently have made comments about how pretty and perfect a blog can make someones life appear (mine in particular) so I thought it might be a good idea to highlight a bit more of our world this afternoon - not just the polished moments.

Yesterday morning I woke up reeeeeeeally slowly. I hate the morning if I could change one thing about myself I would want to be a morning person. Mr. Gough and my bestie are both morning people and I have always been envious. Chris is so helpful with breakfast especially if the kids have been up in the night which happens often still around here. So yesterday Simon (also a morning person) bounds into our room with a huge grin and says:

"hey Mom guess what game we are playing"

"what game?"

"slip on the banana peel"

"oh so how do you play that one again?"

"you run and jump and slide across the floor on a banana peel"

"that's what I thought, perfect"

And so of course my day begins. Yesterday with me on hands and knees scrubbing up nasty banana peel. And on it continues. It never really ends does it - to all you moms out there with young kids. Sitting down is rare and peace and quiet does not exist. A baby is one thing but the discipline and emotional needs as the kids keep growing just seems to keep stretching me. Our world is a lot of beautiful chaos and you will most likely find me in my sweats until well into the eleven o'clock hour with frazzled hair and not a lot of patience to go around.

And my health has been super bad since the beginning of the year (keeping in mind Josie was still only a few months old) it seems like I have attracted every.single.virus that exists in these parts and now to top it off my doctor is fairly convinced I have mono - MONO - like what you get when your in high school what the hay is this all about. I don't know for sure because the lab work is about $500 bones and we don't have insurance for a few weeks still with Chris' job change so here I sit, exhausted after walking up the stairs kind of tired, horrible throat pain, fevers and an aching spleen, still nursing a baby, I am feeling weary to the core of my being. It's the first time in a long time where there are moments in my day that I am convinced I might not make it through I long to go into my room and lay down and take a twelve hour nap.

But there have been so many bright spots. Our friends Beth, Tavo, Toni and Mio so generously watched ALL THREE of my babes this week so that I could take a lavish nap alone. Seriously felt like I died and went to the spa! My boys also finished up swimming lessons (pictures to come) and a week of vacation bible school which they have loved. Never mind the ten o'clock bed time I seriously have never seen them enjoy something so much! And yes a sweet picnic date out in our backyard that I shared yesterday which was a sweet pick me up for sure.

I just wanted to keep it a bit real though this afternoon and encourage all of you even those who I don't know personally that life is full of ups and downs, hard days and smelly jobs and bright neon moments of love that come in and and remind us that its all a journey and we are not alone.

I have also been channelling my inner summer camp circa 1985 this week and making all kinds of friendship bracelets which Lord willing will hit my etsy shop on Monday!

I hope that you guys have a wonderful weekend with bright moments of life, even if your weary too be blessed and encouraged that it's a marathon and we're running together!
xo,
Rebekah

12 comments:

  1. Thank you for being real in this post...and for inspiring me to go right now and polish my nails a neon pink. Glad to have found you :)

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  2. Aww, *hugs*! It's nice reading someone admit they are a real person with real problems, though. Just take comfort in knowing that your bad day can help encourage others that they're not alone.

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  3. Thank you for your sweet honesty.

    You know Beth and Tavo?! Me too! I had no idea. I only knew you were friends with Andi. We all used to go to the same church. Peaches, all of them.

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  4. I always love it when moms are real and share with us that their life is not always all put together. I can totally relate. Thanks!

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  5. Love you, strong neon girl! xxoxo

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  6. thank you for sharing this today. when i read blogs i try to remind myself that i'm seeing only moments of life, and that we are all going through so much of the same sorts of things. i will pray for you to be feeling better very very soon. i really hope you don't have mono - ugh, i can't even imagine. well, your blog is lovely and you really do shine bright here in the land of blog :) thanks for being you.

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  7. Thanks for being real on your blog. Sometimes I get off Reader at the end of the day and feel like a total failure as a Mum. It is nice to know that not everyone has a perfect life. I hope you start to feel better soon.

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  8. Whenever I'm sick I always try to focus on being thankful for all the time I am Well and have strength and energy. I can't imagine how difficult that would be ever waiting for the strength and energy return. Bless your heart for still finding the bright side.

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  9. Dear Rebekah,

    Thank you for this candid post. I too struggle with the 'chipper, positive vibe' that I portray on my blog. No, my life isn't perfect either. But I've committed to a vision for my blog which is about crafting a beautiful, peaceful, inspiring place. It is at your discretion how you want to interact in that space. I would assume that readers can imagine that your - or anyone else's - life isn't perfect :) We all try, right?

    In any case, I wish you all the best of luck with the health issues, the insurance and the daunting task of motherhood. I am not a mother (yet) but am full of admiration for those who are.

    Hang on in there!

    Blessings,
    This Good Life

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  10. Oh, Rebekah, I am right there with you on so many parts of this post! If this is a marathon then I feel a lot like I did around mile 16 - not at my last wisps of energy but still really feeling it and wondering how much longer this pace can be sustained.

    "Sitting down is rare and peace and quiet does not exist."

    No kidding. I think that I might be more of a morning person were it not for the fact that once my ankles swing over the side of the bed they literally don't stop moving until I get in bed again that night.

    "I think I have been looking really hard for something super bright - if I am honest with you I am a bit weary."

    I just a bought a yellow sweater. It's my 5th of the year and represents a conscious choice to appear happy!

    "a few friends recently have made comments about how pretty and perfect a blog can make someones life appear"

    I love it when the dirt gets laid out. I've seen it on blog after blog and always the show of support and relatedness is amazing. My dinky blog isn't always the bastion of perkiness but I often try to write things as I want to remember them. Knowing that one day my daughter will have our history (written in my blog) keeps me true. There is reality but there is also the sweetness: I want her to know that there was always sweetness.

    I hope you are feeling better very, very soon.

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  11. Poor girl! My feelings of exhaustion can't compare with mono, but i do feel for ya, and really, really hope you can get some sleep and feel better soon. praying for grace to keep going! :)

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  12. Dear Rebekah,
    You are dear and you brighten the world. Remember, You ARE Enough.
    xoxo,
    Vicki

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