( a belated post for my sweet Zeb who turned one on May 3rd. Pictures from his birthday breakfast!)
Dear Zeb,
I can hardly believe that it is already time to write you your very first birthday letter. It's bittersweet for me - you are going to be my last baby and to be honest it's all just gone by way too fast. In so many ways you were our BIG surprise package. I still scratch my head at the timing, all that we had endured the months leading up to finding out about you. The job loss, the houses lost, the cars and school and church and community we lost...I was very sick and weary and was still caring for a young baby. Yes you were a surprise indeed, or rather a gift just as your name means. Zeb: "a gift of Jehovah, dwelling of honor". God gave you to me Zeb during a season that felt so deeply painful and barren. A time in so many ways that my heart is still recovering from. But instead of forgetting us He placed you in my arms and reminded me that sometimes blessings are not the things that make life easy or comfortable but the things that bring us love.
Zeb you are truly one of the sweetest babies ever. Your disposition is hilarious, you are an observer of life (mainly three older siblings :)) and have a very quiet gently way. You laugh so easily too it is awesome. All your brothers and sister have to do is give you a look and you're a fit of giggles making us delight in the joy inside of you!
On the eve of your first birthday you were crying yourself to sleep (for the record Josie kept stealing your binky and turning on and off the light in your room :)) but instead of letting you settle yourself I went in and picked you up and carried you downstairs to the rocker by the fire. I sat with you snuggled in my arms and melted into a sea of tears. Rocking my last baby on his last night before turning one. I never ever knew how much I wanted you or how very much we needed you to complete our big family of six. I am so very grateful for all the love and joy you have brought into our home.
I love you Zeb more than you will ever know - I love getting to know you more and more everyday. At your birthday party when we sang to you I loved watching you look around the room and take in everyone there, everyone smiling and celebrating you. You drink in life so intentionally, I already learn so much from you buddy and I can not wait to see what this next year holds!
Love,
Mom
Tears! This is so beautiful rebekah! I really, truly, absolutely don't know how you do it all, and you are so inspiring to me! Your little zeb is so sweet, and he really seems like such a perfect gift to your family.
ReplyDeleteOh, Zeb, we all love you so much! And Rebekah, you so perfectly captured him in this post! He really is such a gentle baby, such an observer, such a tender-heart. I absolutely love your line: "sometimes blessings are not the things that make life easy or comfortable but the things that bring us love." I got the chills as I read it. How true! Love to all six of you!!
ReplyDeleteoh rebekah, these photos and your heart expressed in words for zeb--such a beautiful, fun, honest reflection for his first birthday. i love you so much, zeb, and just cannot imagine our lives without you!! i am so excited to watch you continue to grow and bless the world around you. and i am looking forward to watching your friendships with your cousins continue to develop as well! it was so sweet watching you share toys with luke the other night at our house. happy happy birthday, buddy!!
ReplyDeleteI am just getting caught up here and couldn't wait to read your letter to Zeb. Just precious my friend. Your big, deep, wide love for him, and your gratitude in the midst of the hard work of parenting and hard circumstances of life is beyond beautiful. I am sitting here in the cool morning chill of the house and could feel the warmth of that fire, of your soft strong arms holding your babe and the tears of that moment welled up in me too. With barely a moment to write about this crazy amazing journey of parenting, it so blessed my soul to be able read your words and has encouraged me for the day ahead. Happy Belated Birthday to your sweet gift from Jehovah!
ReplyDeleteThe sweetest post ever and I can so relate especially to this part: "...reminded me that sometimes blessings are not the things that make life easy or comfortable but the things that bring us love.". What a sweet little person Zeb is and I'm so happy that you got to treasure his last few moments as a "baby". It does seem like after the first baby...all the others grow so fast and everything happens in the blink of an eye. You are such a beautiful mother - all of your kids are lucky they get to call you mama! xo!
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"But instead of forgetting us He placed you in my arms and reminded me that sometimes blessings are not the things that make life easy or comfortable but the things that bring us love." So wise and so true. Love you!
ReplyDeletethis is so beautiful, rebekah. blessings to you and your beautiful family.
ReplyDelete